I’m on the fence post.
Do I back out again? Do I go forward?
Last year, I chickened out from meeting with the publishing agent. I felt so ill equipped. ((Sigh)) And guess what?? It is time for me to make the decision as to whether or not I am ready to meet the agent. I must register by Friday. Ahem….. butterflies the size of Texas are already settling in my stomach. I am feeling so unprepared and scared.
Satan keeps whispering, “You’re not a writer worth publishing.”
“You will never be published.”
“Your are just one in a million who are failing as a writer.”
“You can’t do this.”
This has penned me inward. I am starting to busy myself with stuff so I have the excuse of “I’m not ready.” If I fill up my schedule, I won’t have the proposal done and then I can say…..maybe next year.
I am trying so hard to just focus on God’s big picture. There’s got to be a lesson in here somewhere. He’s going to teach me something from the meeting. Maybe He will open a door. Maybe a blessing will rain down. How will I know if I sabotage?
I need God’s exterminating ability to squash those butterflies. (I just laughed thinking…. hmmmm never thought God would hear me call Him the Almighty Exterminator!)
I hope you enjoy your Monday. It is so hard to believe July is this week! Please keep me in your prayers.