I have no idea what I was thinking!! I started a part time job at our local library. There is no other place like the library. This position was made just for me!! I mean come on……. it’s not like I am there every chance I get anyways!!
But something I didn’t think about was that I had 3 BIG sweet treat orders this week. A couple of cakes, 9 dozen cupcakes and 10 cake pops on a regular week it would have been a breeze. And to throw devotionals that I am writing for my church’s Lent Blog Series into the mix, just adds to my load.
I’m not complaining. I am just saying, that I should have postponed my start date. But, I was excited! I just couldn’t wait to get to work! So, after the first day I found myself completely exhausted. And, my poor family has had to suffer my “grumpy” attitude.
By the second day, I crawled into bed at 7:30. I just had no energy what so ever. I worked; then rushed home to bake, frost, and create. Oh and some how I find myself waking up at 4 am to do laundry, clean house, and write.
Exhausted! Yesterday, I woke up somewhat refreshed at 4am…… as refreshed at 4 a person can be……But, by the time, I had baked 4 dozen cupcakes, wrote a couple of devotionals, got the kids up and ready for school, made breakfast, a couple of loads of laundry, cleaned the kitchen, (thank God Mark did make the lunches), and I got ready for work, I could barely keep my eyes open.
As I was driving to work, I began putting myself through the wringer. Thoughts of I should have just been satisfied with staying at home and what were you thinking thoughts ran through my head. Oh there were other thoughts as well……. guess, I misread God’s lead, I should give up writing, I should stop making cakes all together…… it was brutal! I found tears streaming down my face. Something I often do when I am so tired.
And then, I heard “Your Love Never Fails, It Never Gives Up On Me” sweetly coming from my radio. Instantly, my mind’s exhausting brutality stopped and I was filled with God’s strength. He isn’t giving up on me. I am giving up on me. Then, song after song on AIR 1 played just for me. I came to a stop light and literally threw my hands up in the air and praised God! I was singing along with the tunes and I felt so energized! I wasn’t even aware of the man in the car next to me staring until I looked over and I waved! I wanted to roll the window down and shout, “God is so good!” But the light turned green and he sped off…..burned rubber I think the term might be. Now that I think about it, perhaps my mini worship service must have scared him off. Anyone who sits near me in church can verify that I can get a little crazy with my joyous singing! In fact, it just might be called, “scary”.
Needless to say, I fell into prayer when I pulled up to the library. I thanked God for the burst of energy and filling me up with so much of Him. I know that I am following God’s guidance. This is just an extraordinary week. I am sure that the dust will settle and I will find the perfect routine to my day.
And well, I am up at 4 again this morning but I am still hearing “Your Love Never Fails” in my head. Such a wonderful tune! I feel inspired and completely fulfilled. See, what I am trying to get at is simply this…….I CAN’T do anything alone. God will help me along the way. I will find REST in Him. I will find EMPOWERMENT from Him. I will be able to GET THROUGH the day because of Him. Ain’t He good????