Yesterday, I was sitting at the retro-table in the bakery dining area. The mom bounced her baby girl on her knee. Such a sweetie-pie….. lips and face covered in the lavender buttercream and bits of vanilla cake decorated her hands. Content. Happy. Bouncing on mom’s knee.
We talked cake, cupcakes, and cakeballs. Planning a shower for a friend’s wedding celebration…… envy swelled in my heart as I listened and watched the wee one enjoy the cupcake. Longing for time to rewind as I watched my “adult” daughter working behind the bakery cases.
My heart melted. No, it broke. I wanted what this frazzled mom had. I’m frazzled but in a different sort. Mine is business oriented. Her’s is motherhood of wee ones. Her baby is embarking on the early milestones. Mine is facing the early adulthood ones. Will I be there? Will she want me to be there?? No. not broken. Shattered. I remember her age…. I didn’t want mom around.
So the shoe is on the other foot now.
I know now what Mom felt.
Wonder. Did Mom cry like I do most nights?
I suspect so.
My mind was refocused with a simple question on food allergies followed with a round of “How on Earth did you start this bakery?” The usual I-taught-I-ministered-I-blogged-cakes-filled-in-the-financial-gaps spill. As I rattled on, she pinpointed the word “ministered.” As she asked ministry related questions, I recalled the conversation I had just a few weeks ago with my pastor. Three funerals, a couple of speeches to ladies groups, and he was fishing for if I was going back into ministry.
I miss it. I really do. I miss planning all the ladies retreats. I miss blogging about Jesus. I miss seeing God in all the little things around me.
“What a fabulous ministry you have here.” she stated.
I was snapped back into the present. I smiled.
“Most food allergy moms have no where to turn.” she continued. “You understand the fear.”
I moved in my seat quite uncomfortably.
“You’re a comfort.”
I smiled. I looked at her beautiful daughter. “You have a beautiful ministry, too.” I pointed out.
“Yeah,” she surprisingly spoke as she glanced at her baby, “I guess you’re right.”
Ministry happens. It is in everything we do. Don’t let a moment slip you by without praising, worshiping, or speaking His name. At times we look back and long for what we once had, or look forward to the things we are embarking, but we live in the present moments in life. Cherish them. Bless them. Most of all….. be grateful that God has given us them to live.