It's Time

Denying it is so much easier.

Ignoring it has the same result.

Am I ill?  No.  Well, maybe in the head but that can be argued for another time.

I have questioned God with this decision ever since I heard.  The Arkansas Conference followed God’s instruction to send our Pastor and family elsewhere.

But, I can’t just send him off without some kind of personal acknowledgement.  See, in the four years he and his family have been with us, healing changed me.

Yes, healing.  I am not the same person I was 4 years ago.  Brother Stephen and his sweet wife, Leila have played an important role in that healing.

I was a wreck 4 years ago.  Bitter filled.  Wanting revenge.  Angry like no bird could imagine to be.  Ready to explode or implode….. both of which are extremely unhealthy.  My rage turned to behavior I am so embarrassed to admit having……

I thought my spirit was crushed and damaged forever.  I didn’t have strength nor the will to even attend church anymore.  Leila befriended me and listened to my story.  She didn’t judge.  She didn’t do anything more than listen as I unraveled the hurt, betrayal and distrust in my role as a member of our church.

She listened.

Meanwhile, Brother Stephen taught.  He encouraged me to dig deeper than I ever had.  He stretched my thinking to a whole other level.  He never once told me what to do but let me figure out the mess I had managed to create on my own.

Outside of blogging, I had pretty much left ministry.  Well, let’s be honest.  I might have been blogging but the ministry had left my heart.  I was going through the motions.  I didn’t believe half the words I was typing.

But as Stephen taught, my heart began to listen.  I followed a path that God laid before me.  The Bakery.  If it wasn’t for Stephen and Leila’s example of being obedient and teachable moments, I would have ignored God and continued to do what I had been doing…… creating a mess.

Now, the time has come for me to say farewell to two people that has taught me so much.  As much as I hate it.  I understand that obedience is the key no matter if we don’t get why it has to happen.  That’s part of being a Christ follower.  We have to follow.

A new chapter is about to begin for all of us.

Stephen.  Leila.  May God bless you both.  Thank you so much for everything you have done in service with me/for me and our church family.  It has been an honor.  And the biggest blessing ever.

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