So over the past few weeks, I have really contemplated my blog challenge. I have been analyzing my life, searching for answers as to why I feel like I do, and waiting for God’s direction.
His direction was being sent constantly, I just wasn’t ready to hear it. I have been hearing his soft whisper for a long while…… Go walk…… Read your Bible…… Go to Bible study….. Blog….. Eat right….. I was out of sync.
Yep, I was doing everything in my power to literally not listen. And the first step in this month’s challenge is to listen. I need to follow His lead in everything. I have no excuse not to follow His commands.
If you love me, keep my commands. John 14:15
When I look back when I was the biggest Jesus Freak, I was in tune with what God expected from me. Many times it is my need for control or my desire to do what I want, that keeps me from following His commands. But, He knows what is best for me. I would I ever think that my way is best?!?!?!?!?
Secondly, for this challenge is to rekindle the grateful heart. My heart has grown bitter. I have allowed callouses to form and to prevent me to feel the gratitude I need to live positively.
Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Colossians 3:15
Thankfulness leads to peace. Peace is what I need. I have been so restless. I have longed for just a peaceful moment each day. Most days have been filled with dread. Most days I feel anger, sadness, and unsettled. Things have to change…….
So this morning, I looked for snapshots of gratitude. I walked this morning and kept an eye out for little signs of God’s love and wonder. Nature is where I find peace. God’s grace and love and mystery surrounds me and it is about time I look for those nuggets.
I did…… I found God’s wonder…….
I captured the moment, the feeling, and beauty.
So far the challenge includes me listening and following God’s commands and to have a grateful heart. And the third part of this month’s challenge should be something I do regardless. But, I am stubborn, a control freak, and well……. not the smartest.
God’s been nudging a long time on this one. And well, I need to listen. My food allergies and intolerances have really been a challenge. I will say things like…… “It is worth the stomach ache.” “It’s a holiday and I am gonna have it.” Ummmmmm how crazy is that? I know if I eat cow products I will get sick….. yet I will. I know if I eat gluten or root veggies my stomach swells and I feel miserable for days….. yet I eat them. Why? Why? Why would I do that? Again, it goes back to my control thing. I would rather be in control than in comfort. Crazy isn’t it.
So there’s my challenge. So, only time will tell……….