Welcome 2019

My gut asks, “What tragedies will 2019 bring?” My mind reminds me, “Work, college classes and two graduations, a 50th birthday, an empty nest, son’s dental / ENT work and purchasing another wing at the children’s hospital.”

Then my heart says,

“For I know the plans I have for you,” says the LORD.  “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”  Jeremiah 29:11

I have sat down every day since my Christmas break began to blog.  I have written every day but just can’t seem to publish them.  I guess those words are just too personal to share.  However, they have been therapeutic.   I have faced some ugly truths over the past few days.  Some harsher than others but it was good to break through all that negativity and yuck.

As I sat in church Sunday, I realized that 2018’s word for me was Bitter.  I don’t know how many times I asked my co-teachers after I have made a statement or two (ummmm probably more like a rant) “Bitter, much?”

Then I heard this—

Bitterness is like drinking poison and expecting someone to die.

Makes you stop and think doesn’t it?

I spent the year building a bitter brick wall around me unaware of the damage I had really caused.  I heard this quote the other day:

The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keeps out the joy.  Jim Rohn

Now if that didn’t shake me to the bones.  I have imprisoned my spirit.  I am held captive to my own device.  With each brick I laid, I stopped praying, reading God’s word, attending church, and serving as a Christian speaker.  I have isolated myself in my own misery even though I can justify each bitter brick.

So I only have one goal for 2019:

Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable.  Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.  Philippians 4:8

It is going to require a lot of hard work and a sledge hammer to break through this bitter brick wall.  Guess I better roll up my sleeves.

Welcome 2019.